I bought Asherons Call that Saturday. After watching me play all day Saturday, BK Cavalier, my roommate, went and bought a copy for himself. In my first adventure I ran from my starting spot to a town named Shoushi. This town was dead so I ran out into the swamps. While fighting a group of Mosswarts and losing in a big way, I ran across I guy named Gazza. We decided sticking together would help us die a lot less often (my BK teamwork mind at work). We adventured together all weekend and had a blast. He swore to me as a vassal for some reason (LOL) and we became the best of friends. Cavalier, seeing how much fun I was having, then bought the game too, and swore to me as a vassal also.
Meanwhile Mech Warrior was falling apart due to extreme cheating and hacking. I told my clan about AC but they were die hard Mech Warriors and were not too interested in it. I promised them that I would still be on MW as often as before, but I would also be playing AC a lot. This didn't go over well with the BKs that just wanted to stick with MW3 only. After much discussion, I finally just decided to let it go. SquireSCA split off to lead the BKs that were loyal to MW3, and I moved on, with only a couple of members, to take BK into becoming a multi-game clan, in Asherons Call 1
The splinter group of BKs reformed into a clan called IC. For some reason the IC thing didn't work out well. Eventually some of them, discovering that BK was still alive and kicking in Asherons Call 1, rejoined us in the land of Dereth. Some of the people that rejoined wanted to bring with them some friends they had recruited while under the IC tag. BK_Azrael was one of those people, and went on to be one of THE most important and respected BK members.
Slowly but surely all BK eventually got into AC, and left MW3 for good. I had a patron now, being in my mid 20's. Her name was Terra Silvermoon and if it was not for her I never would have made it through anything in AC. She helped me in every way possible and is the most respected person I have ever met in Asherons Call. But as the clan grew, as did my level, she eventually turned the clan over to my lead and I became the monarch.
I took each BK that came into AC from MW3 and held their hand since day 1. I would literally have them call me at my home when they installed AC. I would walk them through character set up, equip them with all the best items I had, then take them out and watch over them as they leveled using my buffs and protections until all hours of the night. Many a night I was up until sunrise trying to help my clan. We slowly grew stronger and stronger ...
We eventually had over 200 members of the Black Knights in Asherons Call. I reached levels above 60, as did MANY of my members. We became a huge and powerful clan. Our name was known all over the globe. I received compliments constantly about members of my monarchy. We were a WIDE known clan and not a day went past without me having at least one person asking to join us.
But AC was turning into a job. When I logged in I would seriously spend the first 3 hours doing nothing but answering people and dealing with problems and such. I never got to play. Months went buy and my character never got to fight anything unless it was to rescue someone. AC was stressing me, and taking it's toll on me. I had to concentrate on the lower level members of the clan since the people who were well over their 40's and 50's could easily fend for themselves now. But what it all boiled down to is I was the one who got them to that level.
Some of the high level people didn't quite see it that way though. They forgot were they "came from" and thought of themselves as not getting anything from their monarch. They thought that I should still hold their hand on a daily basis even though they were all leveled up now and I was spending all my time holding the hands of THEIR vassals.
Arguments erupted and rumors spread. I heard so many negative things said about me from a handful of people in my clan who I had dedicated so much time to that it made me sick. These people who had been in BK since the old days were now stabbing me in the back. I truly blame this on myself, I spoiled them, and when they were so powerful that I could not spoil them, they starved for more. Instead of staying up until 6am on the telephone with them all, on day 1, walking them through creation, and powerleveling them up, I should have made them fend for themselves.
Eventually to make a long story short, some of these people tried to steal my clan out from under me. I decided to do them a favor instead. I released ALL 200+ followers from under me, basically disbanding the clan completely, and told them that if they truly wanted to be in my clan then they are more than welcome to come back, but at least this way they were free from me if that is what they secretly wanted.
Many came back as I knew they would. I knew all along who was loyal and appreciative, but I didn't want to point fingers. We moved on to Darktide (global PVP server) as Harvestgain got boring. You can read at direct copy of my good-bye to them all here ...
First off, this pain's me. More than one would think a video game could ever affect someone. But it does...
I'll put it bluntly at first, then get into details later...
I cannot take the bullshit anymore. The game is no longer fun to me. I get butterflies in my stomach when I am about to sign on HG for months now due to the fact that every time I log on I have to deal with something stressfull or some other bullshit.
It wasn't always like this. I used to look forward to logging on. I used to love logging on at our clan rock and seeing a massive crowd of my followers all getting along and exchanging usefull items and helping each other out no matter what "chain" of the monarchy they were in. I loved wlaking into towns and getting compliments left and right by complete strangers, telling me what a great clan I had. I used to love our quests, and the before quest event where we would all get butt ass naked and raid the mossy fort just to see the newbies freak out when they saw like 50 people come running in with nothing but burlap underwear on LOL. I used to love all the great things we did. Our clan would send 10 people over level 40 just to help a member who was maybe level 10 and died to a water golem. We were ALWAYS there for each other no matter who you were or what level you were.
But I can think of one flaw I made, which was a major reason of this downfall. More than 60% of you I did this with. I would help you design a good character, met you at Shoushi SE, took you to our rock, equipped you to the teeth, took you out and buffed you and would stay up till like 6am every night. Basicly, I raised too many of you since birth and coddled you. You "grew up" not knowing what it was like to have it rough. Now some of you this is not true for, but to most it is. I never had this for myself, I wore Yoroi armor until like level 30.
As time went on, you all grew up and were extremely high level. Hell some of you were on the edge of surpassing me. I was proud, I did well. I took you from level 1, and made you what you were that day. But many forgot what I had done. They saw themselves as now being self sufficient. And they were. BUT, they forgot who got them there. Many of them got the attitude (and I quote) of "T-Bird sits on his ass and reaps in the exp from me and doesn't do shit for me in return". To those of you I say this ...
Did you ever think about the nights I stayed up until real life sunrise trying to help you level? Did you think of the man hours and finances I invested into getting you where you were that day? Did you forgot (though I NEVER usually base shit on material things) all the millions of motes, shards, keys, strings, etc.. I have handed out? Do you forgot that when I get shit like a 2-7 cestus (just an example) I immediately pass it down the line though I, the monarch, the highest level in the clan, still only used a 2-5 cestus? Did you forget that over 50% of you had my personal cell phone number and I would let you call me and have me fucking log on if you needed help? And I did too !!! I bent over backwards, and literally sucked myself dry for this clan. I'd hate to tell you this, but if I took all the exp I have EVER got in my ENTIRE lifetime as a monarch (and remember I have a leadership of like 250.) it would maybe level me 4 or 5 times. The time I wasted (though I didn't consider it a waste) helping this clan, I could have leveled 40 times if I spent it hunting. So trust me, the exp NEVER outweighs the work you do as a monarch.
Now don't get me wrong, MANY of you understand all this and greatly appreciated it all, and I know this. I just had to get that off my chest, you will get your props later in the post.
Lately things got shitty. Every day it was something stressfull for me to deal with. We had people fucking fighting over women (I still don't get that cyber sex shit). We had fuckers all mad and wanting to steal my clan out from under my feet because they think I don't do shit for them anymore. We had people that were just plain turning into assholes. As of tonight, signing on to yet even more shit, I finally said fuck it and released EVERYONE and decided I am done on HG. I will play on DT now. Those of you who wish to come to DT, that'd be great. Those who don't, I am very sorry. One good thing about DT, is those who caused me problems, at least I can kick they ass then LOL. If the bullshit continues on DT, I will end my AC days.
The Black Knights will continue in MW4 of course. That has nothing to do with AC. And we are recruiting, keep that in mind. You guys need to use up your recruitment slots.
Now for the goodbyes. If I leave someone out, it is not that I forgot you. I can never name everyone in that clan no matter how hard I tried. And just like going on vacation, you always forget the most important thing LOL
Lan Cyrix (Gazza) - Damn bro. Of course you are first. You were my first friend I EVER met in AC. My first day, your first day. We both were lost in the swamps of Sawato. We came across each other. Decided we'd live a little longer if we stuck together. The game was so exciting back then. And Lan, you stuck with me to this day. Out of the entire clan, you are the one that is saddening me the most bro. I really consider you a friend and would do ANYTHING for you. Seriously, consider that an IOU. Anything you need that I can do, I promise you I will do it no matter what man. You are a true friend and I would trust you as far as I could see.
Sean Straight Shot - Well, shit. We've been best friends in real life for 16 years now LOL. And you are on your way over to my place as I type this, so I guess that's enough said LOL.
Quan-Xi - It hurts me deeply to do this Quan. I met you so long ago it is blurry. I think we were rescuing a corpse of yours and it ended up turning into a rescue seans corpse mission LOL. You have been my friend for ages. You always swore to the world you'd NEVER join a clan no matter what. And you joined mine without even being asked to, that made me feel VERY special Quan. I owe you deeply for your wonderfull friendship and hope to see you up in MW4. Sean already said he'd use his recruitment slot for you there.
Talbot - hehehe Quickspell. Another person I have known forever. You used to protect me in the mossy fort days back in my first main character at like level 12. You were there for me for a long time. And eventually joined my family and have NEVER caused me any troubles at all. Tell Fingil when he gets back from the military, I am deeply sorry for letting his clan dissolve out from under him while he was away. I feel I have let him down and I am sorry.
Brass Knuckle - I will not mention the recent times Brass. I'd rather think about our fun days. We met through a trade if I am not mistaken? You were a very great friend for a while after that and eventually gave in to my peer pressure and made yourself a great addition to the clan. I had a lot of good times with you man.
Darkrider-Shu & Darkdeath-Shu & Tao-Shu - You guys gotta drive up to ATL and come hang some day. Tao, I know I'll see you in MW4 bro, hell you rarely play AC anymore anyways LOL. Darkdeath-shu, you already know I think of you as like my little brother man. Why else would I always lecture you about shit in real life, or tell ya I won't give ya back your GSA until I see your report card LMAO. Darkrider, I have known you guys since I was very low level. When I first threw the hint to you about joining us, I was actually joking mostly thinking you'd never do it. Then suddenly *poof* you did, and it made me very happy. I had a REAL great time with you guys, I really did.
BK_Phalanx - Man, you are now a friend of mine in real life thanks to these games. You were the first BK ever recruited, and hopefully never leave. I have met you in real life since you live in the town I was born in, and you are a GREAT friend. I used to laugh so hard when you'd call me on the phone with "Man there is some god damn life mage juicing off me !!!" lolol. You the shit Phal, and I would appoligise for leaving you hanging, but I think you saw this coming since you were the one I always vented to.
BK_Azrael - Man, I don't really know which direction to take this. You were at one point one of my favorite BK's of all time. You did a LOT for this clan, lead many quests, gave losts of nice things and your time. You were a fucking OUTSTANDING MW pilot and a great addition to the Black Knights. But you changed bad Az. You suddenly got a very bad attitude and became more and more like what Zac had become. It saddens me Az, but you are not the same person you once were at all man.
Arion Dukat and his followers - I feel real bad about this guys. You all had been VERY close friends of this clan for some time now. And it took a lot of convincing to get you guys to finally join us. You are probably the hardest and most desired group I had ever tried to convince to join us. And I thank you for giving us a try, and sorry I let you down.
Nitecrawler & The Dude - Well, you guys are just the shit. And you are BK's in MW4 so you won't get rid of me that easily hehehe. It was so funny that day when Sean and I were out near the skeleton castle and ran across The Dude hehehe. Freaked us out LOL.
GM Warrior - Out of all the non-BK's (I refer to people we met in Asherons Call then became BK's as this) you had to be one of my most favored. You met this clan a long time ago, and I doubted you. I remember telling sean to be carefull since a lot of people who ask to swear to you end up fucking you. But man, look at you now. Still there, and now an official Black Knight and a great addition to our MW4 faction. Glad to have you with us man, seriously.
BK-Cat - Cat, my man. You have come farther since the beginings of this clan than anyone I have EVER known. Seriously man. You know how you used to be. You have no doubt impressed me more than ANYONE I have ever met online man. I consider you one of my greatest online friends and would trust you with anything. See ya in MW4 bro.
Threeclaws - You HOMO !!!! lol. How dare you call me at home after 10pm !!!!! Funny thing is, when you called me today, my g/f said "Who is that" and I tried to refresh her memory of that night you woke her up and she don't remember it LOL. Anyways, not much to say man, since I talked to you today about this. You are a VERY good follower to have had. Hell when you got "uber" instead of bitching that I no longer did much for you, you flipped it around and started pampering me with gifts and shit LOL. You are the greatest bro, and can't wait to fight alongside you in MW4. Keep in touch, I consider you a real life friend of mine and would never forget ya bro.
BK-Bones - Bah, you know you da man !! lol. Not really much to say, you been with BK for so damn long you know me too well. And I ain't going far from ya since you'll be right alongside of us in MW4. Sorry if I screwed you over by leaving like this, you know I NEVER had any troubles from you man.
Talon Nightshade - hehehe. I ain't gettin all mushy with you bro LOL. You know wassup. Hell, if you were in my shoes you'd have said fuck it long before now LOL. I think out of all 200+ people, you are seriously the closest to my identical twin (personality wise). We definately gotta hang sometime man. Hope to see you in MW4 too man. You were like one of the original BK's of all time man, can't let that slip.
BK-Nemesis - hehehe, remember back when I first met ya I was always like "That guy is too damn quiet". LOL. Now that I know you so well man, you are a great person. I've loved having you in my clan, and will continue to enjoy it as we ride off into MW4 where we always belonged. Stay cool bro, and let's kick some Mech ass.
BK-McLaren - When I got you into BK, is about the time we all started playing AC. Then I got you into AC, and am VERY impressed with how far you got and how fast. Sorry to seem like I am dipping out on you man. You were a GREAT pilot and a follower that NEVER caused any trouble what so ever. I seriously beg that you continue on to MW4 with us man, you were a great person to have in the clan and if you didn't, you'd be missed by me greatly.
BK-7mm - Man, we thought we had lost ya over a year ago when you disappeared from the net due to real life shit. I almost shit that day I signed on and someone was like "Dude, 7 is back !!!". Talk about an old school BK'er, you are definately one !!! Hoep you continue on to part 4 man. And I am so impressed, you were the last BK to get AC, and you are right up there with the rest of them already. Nice work man, seriously.
BK_Soulscream - Man, you've been a BK with me since day 1, long before AC was even invented. You were a great person in the AC side of this clan. I really hope like the other BK's you come on over to MW4. You are up there with my most memorable people I have EVER known online, and if not, please promise to keep in touch with me man. P.S. Are you sure it isn't BK Soul's Cream ? lolol
BK_Trynian - Wow, what can I say to someone of your standing with this clan man. You were what the 2nd BK ever next to Phal? (remember me and Sean don't count). You were our General back in MW3, our person in charge of recruiting. You've been through it all with us and I'll be damned if you were not close to, if not THE, best pilot we EVER had. And the hardest person EVER to convince to get Asherons Call. Which now makes me feel like shit since I dipped out like this. But I will let you know, NOTHING has to do with you at all man. You rule bro.
BK_Q - Damn man, hehehe, glad this isn't MW, or you'd kick my ass LOL. You know how embarassing it is leading a clan then having someone like you in it who could whoop my ass any day? LOLOLOLOL. But this isn't MW, it is AC. Not really luch good bye to say since you are on DT with me. As for HG, I am sorry, but you are a very understanding person and I am sure you see it from my standpoint.
Loreve - I forget who your patron was so wanna make sure I didn't leave you out. hehehe. I must say, I REALLY enjoyed your presence. All those stressfull days when I was getting so fed up, you'd @tell me and make me smile instantlly. You are a great person and I will miss you a LOT. Please keep in touch with me, I'd love to hear from you.
Cybernetics - well, duh, you live with me LOL I doubt this is news to you hehehe. As a matter of fact, as soon as I post this I am comin upstairs to get you for a cig break, better be awake man !!! lol
Sero - well LOL, we became such good friends that you moved down here (today actually LOL, ironic huh). And you just left my place about 5 min ago, so not much to say to you either LOL.
Blacklightning - Damn man, you've known me since my newbie days. Was real shocked that day I ran into ya, and even more shocked when you joined us hehehe. I do feel bad though, like I am letting you down. And for this I am sorry man, and hope you keep in touch with me. You were ALWAYS a great friend to me.
Zac - Zac zac zac ... I remember the day I got you set up and going on Asherons Call. You caught on fast, and I must say were what I considered my most important vassel and most powerfull vassel. Hell it was a struggle for me to stay ahead of ya LOL. But you changed man, and this may seem rude, but at this point I really do not care. You suddenly forgot everything I had done for you. You forgot who babysat you and held your hand since "birth" on Dereth. Yes, so I haven't been able to do much for you lately. But explain to me how a monarch can do much for a level 60+ vassel who has more than his monarch could ever have due to the fact that the monarch has a hell of a lot of others to look after too. It saddens me to see what you turned into. And I've seen it coming for a long time. It started as a small snow ball, that I should have melted long ago, but instead I let it keep rolling and it ended up becoming so large it destroyed me. I do not know exactly what happened to you man. You were my favorite vassel, and the person I would send my most important friends to for a patron. I had nothing but compliments from all the followers I threw your way. But then that all crumbled as your attitude changed, and they changed for the worse. But it is all over now, and all I have to really say is goodbye and good luck.
I have one last person to say goodbye to. And this is the goodbye that kills me more than any other. I would give up everything I have ever done in AC not to have to say goodbye to Terra Silvermoon. You made me who I am today Terra. Unlike some of my vassels, I know who to give credit for, and to this day I STILL say that everything I have accomplished is 110% due to you. I will miss you more than you can ever imagine, and hope you will keep in touch with me. I hope I didn't let you down with how I turned out in the long run since that first day you took me under your wing as your first vassel EVER.
Thank you Terra
Well, that is officially the longest shit I have ever typed, and ever plan on typing again. All in all, I still say that in AC, you guys were the best group a person could EVER ask for. If for some odd reason anyone HAS to have me as their monarch, feel free to, but I would advise against it highly since my HG days will be rare if at all. This is going to kill me to hit that "Post" button below guys/gals. All I have left to say is ....
Thank you all, you really affected me in a good way and I do not regret having this clan at all.
Your friend for life,
T-Bird (Uber mule of HG)
BK_T_Bird (Leader of the Black Knights)
Michael (friend to all of you)
From that point I moved on and played on Darktide with many of my most loyal BKs. Mech Warrior 4 had finally come out and we were slowly moving on to it. Mech Warrior 4 was still pretty much a new game, but BK was as before, tearing up the landscape with the sounds of enemy mechs burning.